Pad Thai

I've had a love affair with pad thai for awhile now. I used to get take out from Zen Zero at least once a week when I was in college, but until Sunday I had never tried to make it myself, and you know what guys? It was super easy!

Pad Thai with Chicken

adapted from Sandra Lee's recipe

2-3 large boneless, skinless chicken breasts
16-ounce package rice noodles
2 tablespoons olive oil
2 large eggs, beaten
1 T brown sugar
3 T soy sauce
1 T fish sauce
1 T chile sauce
1 T lime juice
1 T chopped garlic
1/2 cup chicken broth
1 carrot, grated
4 scallions, sliced thin
2 cups bean sprouts (I omitted these)
1/4 cup peanuts, coarsely chopped
1/4 cup fresh cilantro, roughly chopped

First things first - raw meat freaks me out. I don't like the look of it. I don't like the smell of it. I especially don't like the feel of it so anytime I make something that calls for meat, I start by delegating this task. Usually my dad is the lucky candidate, and Sunday was no different. While I did all the prep work in the kitchen, my dad tossed some chicken breasts on the grill because he's awesome like that.

Meanwhile back in the kitchen, bring a large pot of water to a boil and then turn off the heat. Add the rice noodles, and let them soften for approximately 2-3 minutes. I know. They cook fast. I would also suggest maybe tossing a little olive oil into the water because I had some issues with my noodles sticking together. Drain and set aside.

In a large skillet (if you are fancy and own a wok, use that. I obviously am not married yet so I don't have all the fun, fancy kitchen tools some of you own), add 1 tablespoon olive oil. Once it's hot, add the beaten eggs and cook until they are firm. Remove from the pan and roughly chop. Set aside.

In a small bowl, whisk together brown sugar, soy sauce, fish sauce, chile sauce, lime juice, garlic, and chicken broth. I ended up doubling the amounts called for above for all the previously mentioned ingredients because I didn't seem to have enough liquid to cover the noodles and the chicken later on so if you are having the same issue, try that. Set aside.

At this point hopefully your sous chef with have completed the chicken. :) Chop into quarter inch cubes, and set aside. Add the remaining tablespoon of olive oil to the skillet along with the carrots, scallions, and bean sprouts (if you are using them. I personally can't stand them. Thank goodness Jimmy Johns got rid of them and replaced them with onions. Smart choice JJ. Smart choice).  Stir fry 1 minute. Add the eggs, chicken, and sauce you previously set aside, stirring to coat everything. Cook for another minute. Garnish with peanuts and cilantro, and enjoy!

One step closer to checking off another item on my list of 28 Things Before 28. Only 5 more recipes to go!

Weekend Confessions

Every weekend I always plan to be so productive. All week long I talk a big talk: I'm going to stay in Friday night so I can wake up early to workout, or finally finish weeding the side of the house, or paint the dining room, or do one of the 1,523,764 Pinterest projects I've accumulated. Does this ever actually happen? Of course not. This weekend was obviously no different.

My friends and I were having serious sushi cravings so Friday night we made reservations at Nara. The food and drinks and were great, but I am never full after eating sushi. Does anyone else feel this way?! I can't even believe I'm about to admit to this, but after I dropped my roommates off at the bar (I really did stay in Friday night), I went through the Taco Bell drive-thru...by myself...sober. Low point. Oh ya, and my diet challenge ends Thursday. You guys...whhhhhhhhy did I do that!? And more importantly, why did I just admit to it?! I could have taken that secret to the grave. Instead of throwing away the empty wrappers in the kitchen trashcan, I took the effort to go all the way outside (in the dark no less) to throw them away to ensure no one would know my dirty little secret...yet here I am confessing. I could never be a spy. I crack even when there isn't any pressure.

After my roomies' night out on Friday, and my Taco Bell incident, we agreed we would not be going out and spending money on Saturday. We were going to stay in and be productive. Then we woke up and it was 75 degrees and absolutely gorgeous IN JULY . It was too good to be true. The Westport patios were calling our names! How could we say no?! 

If I had the choice of having a few cocktails outside during the day or hitting the town at night I would absolutely, 100%, always choose day drinking. It really is a win-win. I get to be a little tipsy in the middle of the day while getting a tan, AND I can still be in bed before midnight. I am such a grandma. It's really quite fantastic. Kelly's rooftop patio proved to be quite successful in our ongoing husband hunting quests. Maybe it can be attributed to the semi-sheer top I was wearing, or the cute Daisy Dukes Mal had on, or Mere's sexy little mini skirt, but we had some mad game with the fellas. Oscar and Tyler couldn't keep their hands off us! Nevermind the fact they were 4 and 6 years old, and their parents brought them to a bar. They were having a grand ol' time slapping Star Wars stickers on our boobs and butts. We took being cougars to a whole new extreme. You gotta start 'em young! Just kidding. They were adorable though.

Other than our underage suitors, our only other man-candy for the afternoon was Neil, a friend of a friend who had at least six visible tattoos, was most definitely wearing tighter pants than any of us girls, and could learn a thing or two about dental hygiene. His teeth and nails screamed chain smoker. No way could we pretend to be cool enough for a hipster like that. He was super nice though. Mal and I (fat kids for life), requested ice cream after dinner (which happened to be the two biggest pizzas I've ever seen), and he happily went and bought us two HALF-GALLON tubs from Baskin-Robbins...which we devoured straight from the carton...in her bed. This is why I'm fat..

#pathetic

Does anyone else have any weekend confessions they'd like to share? Please make me feel a little bit better about myself :)

Thursday Thoughts with Jen - Vol 5

Is it just me, or is this the longest week everrrrrrrrrrrr? If it seems like this batch of Thursday Thoughts are random and discombobulated it's because my life is random and discombobulated right now. Also, I just had to sound out the word dis-com-bob-u-lated three times before I spelled it correctly. I need the weekend. Now.

1. Seriously you guys, am I the only one on this entire planet that could care less about this royal baby mumbo jumbo?? It's a baby. Yes he is a prince, but so what? No need to camp outside a hospital for hours on end. Breaking news! He looks exactly like every other two day old infant - tiny and kind of like an alien. If you are in your mid-twenties I'm 99.99% sure you can see plenty of other babies who look exactly the same on Facebook. Every. Single. Day. Can we please all agree any one of these things are way more exciting and get back to our normal lives? Okay good. Moving on.
2. Do you know what today is?? July 25th...which can only mean one thing. Only 5 more months until Christmas! The aisles at Hobby Lobby have been decorated with cheer. In hopes you might buy a tree ridiculously early this year. Remind me never to become a songwriter...or a poet. Anyways, you better believe I will be celebrating today by listening to a few of my favorite festive tunes. Greatest Christmas song of all time? I think so.
3. Someone fill me in. Are there 40-something year old women everywhere running around with their hair in pigtails while they work out, or is my gym just that special? I'm sorry, but unless you are (a) under the age of 12 or (b) dressed up as Pippi Longstocking for a super fun Halloween party, you need to stick with a high ponytail, low ponytail, french braid...literally anything but pigtails. You don't look cute. You just look pathetic.
4. After seeing this tweet from Derek Blasberg last week, it really got me thinking...what did happen to America's most obnoxious reality duo?!?
   
   Seriously. They have fallen off the face of the earth...not that I'm complaining. A good five minutes of Internet research revealed this, this, and this. Let me get you up to speed. Post Hills, they had to move in with Spencer's parents in Santa Barbara because they're broke. They spent all their money before the Mayan Apocalypse like every other normal, respectable human being. The world was supposed to end. Duh. They've since been on a few reality shows (none worth mentioning), and they were most recently spotted in England trying to get another TV show so they could live in a castle. Oh, and they're also thinking about procreating. Now that's a scary thought.
5. Speaking of tweets, I get severe anxiety when I get behind on my Twitter and Instagram news feeds during the day. I was just talking about this with one of my co-workers the other day. Please tell me we aren't alone. I had a particularly busy day at work yesterday and didn't get to check it once. I'm talking 10 straight hours without a single update. I felt so behind in the happenings of the world. I couldn't even have a conversation with my mom when I got home until I was caught up. She just didn't understand. Obviously there were very important pictures of people's fro-yo toppings to review and bathroom selfies to judge before I could even attempt to hold an actual conversation. Don't get me wrong. I love social media, but trying to keep up can be exhausting.
6. If my tweet above didn't clue you in, I crave donuts constantly. Is it totally pathetic I've been talking about planning a trip to Portland for the sole purpose of going to Voodoo Doughnut?!? I must try them all! They look so amazing.

   

   Homemade baked donuts just aren't the same. I need the real deal.

7. You know what else is amazing? SkyMall. Check out this list of the Most Insane Things for Sale in SkyMall. I'm highly contemplating purchasing the enormous wine glass, putting back a bottle, and then attempting to train Evie to use a cat toilet. Who wants to come over for a good time Saturday night?
8. Do you all know the difference between a BBQ and a cookout? Because apparently there is a distinct difference between the two. I was recently informed I could not call my little backyard get-togethers barbecues unless I was all professional and owned a smoker and prepared fancy meats. It appears that some people get their panties in a twist over the distinction between these two. Whatever. It's all the same to me. Friends. Food. Beer. Mosquitoes. Call it what you will.
9. You guys..how did I not know about this before now? Snake repellent is a real thing?! I can hardly stand to look at the website because all the snake pictures give me the heebie jeebies, but I seriously need to buy this. Even though I've only seen one snake in my yard (and it was months ago), it was one too many! Snakes be gone!

Thursday Thoughts with Jen - Vol 4

Hey friends! Time for your Thursday Thoughts with Jen. Enjoy!

1. If you want to be my favorite person in the whole wide world then you should probably bring me this right this second. I must try Golden Oreo Cookies & Cream ice cream immediately. I almost started hyperventilating when I found out about it...AND it really isn't that bad for you with only 140 calories per half cup serving...if I can cut myself off after a 1/2 cup serving. Who am I kidding? That will never happen. 
2. While we're speaking of gifts, if any of you are feeling particularly generous, and you are lucky enough to have a cat lady in your life then you should probably buy her all of these things. These 16 crazy cat lady gifts are fantastic. Kissing cat salt and pepper shakers? I die. 
3. Guys - this one's for you. If a girl isn't even responding to your text messages, she sure as heck isn't going to respond to your Snapchats. I think it's time to give up. Got it? Okay good. Also, am I the only one who thinks Snapchat is a little creepy? No? Okay. Maybe I really am an old lady.
4. Cab drivers are the worst...and creepy too. Being the responsible adults that we are (what a joke), my roommate and I decided to take a cab to an event we attended last week because let's be honest, we're both lightweights and after a beer we probably shouldn't be behind the wheel. Why is it cab drivers never know how to get anywhere? What did they do before everyone had smart phones and Google maps?! Anyways this cab driver was particularly creepy. He looked almost identical to Stanley Tucci in The Lovely Bones. I was seriously questioning whether or not we would get out of there alive. Mal and I were frantically texting each other the entire ride about the likelihood of being murdered and/or vomiting all over ourselves due to his horrible, stop and go driving. At one point he asked about the dinging noises he kept hearing. After replying that it was my cell phone text notification he quietly mumbled under his breath, "a cute little ring for a cute little girl." Yep. I was certain I would not live to see another day. Terrifying. Needless to say we found an alternate ride home. Now I'm just paranoid he knows where we live. Maybe I should invest in an alarm system...
5. Don't get me wrong, I love my cat but she absolutely scares the living daylights out of me when we're home alone at night. Yes I live in an extremely old house, and yes I know old houses make a lot of weird noises, but when Evie suddenly whips her head around and stares intently into the darkness my mind starts going into overdrive. I'm pretty sure I left the garage door unlocked when I took out the recycling this afternoon. There's obviously someone hiding in the dining room behind the curtains. This house was built over 70 years ago. There are at least 16 angry spirits  just waiting to seek their revenge. WHAT DOES SHE SEE/HEAR THAT I CANT?!? I think in the 4 months I've lived in my house I've maybe spent the night by myself a grand total of three nights, but that was enough to know I want to try to avoid doing it again at all costs. I can't believe I was actually planning on living there by myself. Thank goodness for Mal and Maggie and for the poor, unfortunate soul who has to talk me down off a cliff every time I'm alone.
6. Is everyone on this planet pregnant?!? On the 7 minute drive to get fro-yo the other night, Mal and I saw THREE different pregnant ladies out run/walking. Yes, three very prego ladies were out exercising while Mal and I were driving our fat butts to TCBY. After fro-yo we had to run into Target and what do you know? Another pregnant lady. This time we narrowly avoided a physical collision. Next stop - Walgreen's. Another one! Kansas City is swarming. Let's hope there's not something in the water. Lord knows I couldn't handle a baby right now. I can't even keep a house plant alive. Confession - I've already killed three.
7. Mosquitoes love me. If I spend the evening outside with 137 people I can say with absolute certainty I will be covered in bug bites from head to toe the next day while the other 136 people will remain unscathed. Apparently mosquitoes love me more than most. True story - one night in Florence my friend Megan and I slept with our window open. The next day on one arm alone I had SEVENTY (yes you read that right 7-0) mosquito bites. I counted. Megan? She didn't even have one! I had to walk around the remainder of our trip looking like a chicken pox ridden kindergartner. Apparently I've got a scent those nasty little creatures love. Now if only I could figure out what scent attracts men. Bacon? Barbecue? I must find out. Jk...sort of...
8. Am I the only one who thinks this season of the Bachelorette is a total snooze fest?!? Not only are all of Des's guys boring with a capital B, but there isn't much going on with her either. I was over her rags to riches story after the first episode, and can we talk about how effeminate these guys are? They are way more girly than me, and that's saying something. Poems? A love song you wrote that you made your brother and sister perform on your hometown date? I'm embarrassed for you.
9. The first time I heard We Can't Stop I hated it. After the second, third, fourth and fifth time? I'm hooked. Dang you Miley. Although the video is beyond weird.