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You guys. None of the baby weight is in the baby.
I jumped on the fat train, and rode it hard this weekend.
God forbid we eat at my second choice of restaurant. We'd never recover.
God forbid we eat at my second choice of restaurant. We'd never recover.
I was a tight end...back when I was twisted steel and sex appeal.
[referring to Evie] She's not dying. She's old and needs diapers. I don't like the P word and
she makes you say it all the time. Can you trade her in for a younger model? Surely
you have enough equity in her to flip? [editor's note: ...and now I hate you]
[referring to Evie] She's not dying. She's old and needs diapers. I don't like the P word and
she makes you say it all the time. Can you trade her in for a younger model? Surely
you have enough equity in her to flip? [editor's note: ...and now I hate you]
Every time I drive by Bonefish Grill I say, "Bonefish? Bone this."
Chicken thighs are magic.
He NEVER ate. I could eat more than him. I hated
it. He was like a baby bird that I wanted to punch in the face.
Chicken thighs are magic.
He NEVER ate. I could eat more than him. I hated
it. He was like a baby bird that I wanted to punch in the face.
She's cold blooded. She needs a warm, sunny spot to sun herself.
You could put up a pic of your blistered foot and you'd still get 20 likes.
You could put up a pic of your blistered foot and you'd still get 20 likes.
If the women don't find you handsome, they should at least find you handy.
If I was physically capable of crying, I would be now.
Oh I don't floss...not unless I have meat in my teeth.
I'm so bored I taught my iPhone to cuss. No more saying ducking or ducked.
If I was physically capable of crying, I would be now.
Oh I don't floss...not unless I have meat in my teeth.
I'm so bored I taught my iPhone to cuss. No more saying ducking or ducked.
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