Friday Funnies

Back in my glory days at good ol' KU, one of my most favorite things in the University Daily Kansan (our newspaper) was this fantastic little section called the Free for All...that and Sudoku. I'm not sure how I would have gotten through 98% of my classes without that little game, but I've digressed. If you weren't priviliged enough to attend KU (I pity you), let me fill you in. Readers could call in or text submissions, and the editor would sift through what I can only imagine to be a drunken mess, finding those rare, hidden gems which they in turn, published in the Free for All. Pure literary genius (or something like that).

I happen to have some pretty funny friends who say some pretty hilarious things on the reg so I want to bring back the Free for All here on my little blog. Instead of receiving submissions, I'm going to keep my eyes and ears peeled. Beware friends. No text or tweet is safe! I'm always listening. :)

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I'm already ready for my children to be out of the house, and I haven't even birthed them yet.

I think my favorite thing in the world is laying in bed during 

a thunderstorm...that and rainbow sprinkles.

He's a bearded lumber-lectual. I could climb him like a tree.

I would like to raise a baby great white shark so that when it 

grew up it loved me and would let me hug and ride it.

I don't get it. I'm not blogging, tumbling, meme'ing or twatting.

My parents have never seen me drunk until tonight. TFTC. (Editor's note - or confession rather - I had to look up what TFTC means. Too frat to care for those of you who are also clearly NOT frat)

Can we make Tamagotchi's a thing again?

I'm delayed in LA. Hopefully I'll become skinny by proxy since I'm just near all the kale.

I think it would be fun to make out with someone with basil in your mouth...

like pilgrim style. It's true though. It tastes SO good. Is it normal to eat basil?

Our intern just told me he's never been to Salty Iguana. I told him he hasn't been living.

Why am I even going to college? It's clear that my true passion is looking for seashells.

Cold tea. What a concept. What is this called? Me: Iced tea...

There isn't such thing as leftover queso with us. It's just like leftover wine. It doesn't exist.

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