Young and Wild (When Freed) - Texas State Fair

J: This past weekend C and I were in Texas for the KU/TCU game, but I must admit I had ulterior motives for traveling to the Lone Star State on this particular weekend. Sure I might have used the KU game as an excuse to get C to agree to the trip, but the main appeal for me was the chance to consume lots and lots of fried goodies at the Texas State Fair...that and the baby farm animals. Why are baby pigs so stinkin’ cute?!? Friday afternoon we bought our $5 DART tickets and headed off to the fairgrounds, and let me tell you, it was an experience for sure.

C: Jenny and I are both from Topeka, KS, so we are no strangers to the state/county fair scene. I feel comfortable speaking for both of us when I say that growing up the highlight of the summer was the Fiesta Mexicana, a typical parking lot carnival with the standard nausea inducing rides and rigged games of chance, but with the addition of stomach churning Mexican Food. Jen tells me she vomited during her last trip to the Fiesta, so I was excited to accompany her to the Texas State Fair, particularly after she linked this list of best fried foods on her blog. She admitted to me (privately) that the weekend would be a total bust if we didn’t get fried cookie dough. I thought it would be a total bust if we couldn’t get Jen to eat so much she puked. She owes me after I spewed twice the first weekend we spent together. That should tell you something about her cooking. I wouldn’t trust this particular food blogger.  

J: Let me set the record straight. It wasn’t my last trip to the Fiesta Mexicana. You guys know I don’t turn down Mexican food ever. Also, at no point did my cooking make Cory sick. He simply can’t handle his alcohol or was abnormally nervous around me to the point he made himself sick. I’ll let him decide which one of these is the truth.

Anyways, like I mentioned earlier I’d been salivating over attending this particular state fair for years. Everything’s bigger and better in Texas, right y’all? When C asked me to rank my priorities of things I wanted to do in Dallas this past weekend, eating an absurd amount of fried food obviously topped my list. We purchased $50 worth of food tickets, and we both agreed that all of them would be used to sample the various delicacies throughout the fairgrounds. Who has time for rides and games when there’s heart-clogging food to be consumed? Not us. Over the course of maybe 4 hours I tried 7 different items, probably consumed more calories than I’d eaten in the past 3 weeks combined, and by the time we left I looked like I was 6 months pregnant. Hellllllo food baby.

C: (Once again, Jen has more baby talk in her post than I can be comfortable reading.)

Fried Picnic On A Stick: That's spicy chicken, tater tots and pickle slices,
battered, rolled in spicy bread crumbs and fried. Yup. This was only snack #1.

Fried Cuban Sandwich: Marinated pork shoulder, diced ham, Swiss cheese, pickles and secret sauce wrapped
in flaky pastry and you guessed it - fried. This won "Best Taste" this year which is the top award at the fair.

Funnel Dog: Your standard corn dog, but instead of corn batter the hot dog was fried in funnel cake
batter then coated with powdered sugar and covered in chocolate sauce. This was a messy one for sure.

Fried Snickers: Pretty self explanatory. I personally thought this one was
 way too sweet (I know that's surprising coming from me), but C liked it.

Fried Oreos: Also self explanatory, and my personal fave although I
couldn't eat all three. I tapped out after maybe one and a half. 

Fried Guacamole: Both C and myself were super excited to try this one, but we were under impressed.
I don't think the guac was terribly good to begin with, and once it's fried and hot it's just a little
 too weird. It sure makes for a pretty picture though once you bit into it. :)

Fried Spaghetti and Meatball: This was just okay, but we wished we'd
saved room for the fried Cool Ranch Doritos pizza. Maybe next time

J: Food babies are a real thing. I’m not talking about actual babies. Get with it. Anyways, I was pretty much miserable the rest of the night, but you only live once! If possible, I would highly suggest attending the fair with a group of friends so you can all buy different things and take a nibble of each. Although be sure to get your own fried Oreo’s. No one should be forced to share those :)

C: We spent so much time looking for specific and interesting fried food items that we hardly did anything else at the fair. My wallet benefited from Jen’s disinterest in me winning her a stuffed animal at one of the fair games. I do not have the arm strength or accuracy to knock three milk bottles off a platform. Jen is not dating me for my athletic ability. We also did not use our tickets for any of the carnival rides. I was really hoping to drag Jen onto the Octopus, or one of the other twisting, spinning puking aids. We did not watch any of the numerous live bands, we missed the ostrich, pig, and weenie dog races, we did not see any livestock shows (no sheep judging?! I don’t know how we skipped that either), no auto show, Chinese Lantern Festival, pumpkin carving, wine garden, dog agility, greenhouse, cow milking, African acrobats, or Lucha Libre Mexican wrestling. We did however find the baby animal tent, where Jen squalled when I pointed out the piglets. I was able to drag her out before she stuck a baby goat in her purse.

J: There was cow milking?!? How did I not know this? I would have wanted to do that for sure. Also, ostrich, pig, and weenie dog races?!? I think C withheld this information from me on purpose after I spent almost an hour with the baby animals. Now we have to go back.

C: I agree, I didn’t see the Cool Ranch Doritos Fried Pizza until my food tank was well past full.

J: I don’t think my stomach or my arteries could handle it. Maybe we have one more fair trip in our future, but it is highly unlikely I’ll be making the Texas State Fair a yearly tradition. It was worth the $12 admission (side note - be sure to check for coupons online before attending any state fairs. Most of the time there are discounts offered if you attend during the week instead of a Saturday or Sunday. We got $5 off because C’s friend was a smarty pants and thought ahead like that), but now I can check attending a state fair off my bucket list. Now off to the gym so I can fit into my pants again after this indulgent weekend.